At the end of the 22nd century, as entire populations are rendered extinct, Continents drown under increasing sea levels and the gossamer ozone layer ensures that remaining survivors of the human race will be fried like California raisins, historians will look back upon 13th December 2009, upon the United Nations Conference on Climate Change in Copenhagen in order to ascertain exactly why their ancestors did nothing to prevent global warming when they could?
Well, they need look not further.
We were too busy voting for Joe in the X-Factor final.
We are a nation obsessed. The Sunday newspaper, even if it is the Sunday Mirror, is ostensibly X-Factor tittle-tattle with a glancing, reluctant mention of the news. Watching the X-Factor final, I find it disturbing that normal 10-year olds have scrawled the names of finalists upon the faces, ululating girls are almost fainting with excitement and middle-aged professionals; accountants, architects and lawyers, have put their life on hiatus whilst the course of history is determined…Joe or Olly? Olly or Joe?
Even after the X-Factor final, I am force-fed a Susan Boyle TV special featuring a duet with Elaine Paige, whose facial surgery serves “SuBo” a visual reminder that it’s best not to halt the aging process unless you want to look like someone has wrapped cling film around your face.
Tomorrow: hardcore Pomerol action…
Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: | susan boyle, x-factor
