Nativity Day! Lily recites her lines over her healthy breakfast of “Oat-i-bix” and banana, purportedly the ideal petit-dejeuner for any aspiring method actor on the verge of their big break. Afterwards, instead of “Charlie & Lola” and “Peppa Pig”, we sit down to watch “Sophie’s Choice” one final time, so that she knows exactly the standard her parents are expecting.
Tomoko and I take a plastic molded seat in the assembly hall, which is packed with chattering parents armed with Panasonic HD video cameras and fevered anticipation. There is much discussion about who is playing the lead-role of Mary and whether they were chosen in accordance with whoever donated the most to the Parent-Teacher Association? Does playing the role of Mary in the Reception Year Natavity preclude them from reprising the role in Year 1 or Year 2? I would ask the headmistress now, but she seems preoccupied.
Suddenly the lilting refrain of ”Silent Night” is played by Mrs. Chapman, who has apparently been forced out of retirement to tickle the ivories and then down the central aisle come the shuffling angels adorned with paper halos and tinsel (wings clipped to prevent them from flying away), shepherds with tea towels wrapped around their heads, cotton wool sheep and of course, Joseph and Mary, whose faces I memorize just in case they are chosen next year. Just like the real Joseph and Mary 2009 year ago, they look completely bewildered, without a clue of what is going on. Then again, if you had just experienced an immaculate conception with no prospect of a chichi waterbirth in a deluxe private hospital, I suspect you would sport a similar expression.
Two reception class teachers flanking the stage narrate the story, which is basically a fusion of the biblical story and nursery rhymes, hence Lily’s role in the crucial ”Baa Baa Black Sheep” scene, which though I am biased, is the most moving of all. Alas, Lily is on the opposite side of the stage to where we are sitting, so we can see bugger all and admittedly it does not sound like a Barbara Streisand-like performance. But hey, it’s a start and she didn’t freeze.
There is something moving about watching your child in a Nativity. Sure, as a choir they have no rhythm and are completely out of tune, but if you averaged out their voices you would get the correct note. As usual, there is always the one truculent boy/shepherd who spits out the words to ”Away In A Manger” with venom, as if auditioning for the ”Sex Pistols”. There is an over-riding, all pervasive sense of innocence. One day that shepherd will be fretting about a mortgage, that angel will be stood up at th altar and that king proffering plasticine myrrh will be found guilty of affray. But for today, at this moment, they do not have a care in the whole wide world and the sad thing is: they will not be aware of it until they are older and reminiscing about their Nativity play through sepia-tinged memories…like most of the adult audience is doing right now.
We return home. I make last minutes preparations for my trip next week, pick up Lily from school, congratulate her on her moving performance that we shall soon own on DVD for £7.50 per copy, then I chauffeur her and Daisy down to Leigh-on-Sea for a weekend with my parents to let Tomoko have some R&R. In the evening, I go for a cheap Indian at “Bombay Spice” with dad and my brother, managing to order something other than a chicken korma for a change and indeed, the off-piste choice of balti chicken tikka massala goes down a treat.
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